The shocking discovery was made just a few days ago as my baby sister and I dug potatoes up from our veggie garden.
A Tomato Bandit is on the loose.
As if Lucy wasn’t terrifying enough, our little tomato plants have even more reason to tremble.
Caught red handed {sporting an adorable Star Wars onesie},
the bandit sits,
sucking dry the little balls of sweet lycopene-filled goodness before they even have a chance at becoming delicious homemade pasta sauce.
Devouring every last cherry ‘mater – in one sitting – he terrorizes the garden with his insatiable hunger.
Their cries for help muffled in the face of his brute strength.
They didn’t have a snowball’s chance in Namibia.
Leaving a sticky red path of destruction behind him, his rampage far from over…
he heads for the ‘taters and squash,
and sinks all 10 teeth into their petrified skin.
{insert evil chuckle here}
Eventually he grows weary, clinging to a tree branch for support.
The end is in sight.
The garden’s sigh of relief can be heard for miles, as the Bandit – in one final act of brutality – turns the place upside down…
and departs.
Demolition. Complete.
Tomato Bandit. Found.
Potatoes. Saved.
{phew}
